#if u want murder i will give u murder. of the emotional kind.

[mortaltravailed]

puts his hand on kaeya's shoulder. this is diluc ragnvindr, a grown man, not knowing how to verbalize that he would like to give his baby brother a hug ...

the hand on the shoulder is never a good thing.

usually, it's his signal to give up on the drink -- the cue to stop just before he gets too wasted to think straight.

yet this time, drink wasn't even on the cards. in its place upon the table sat one of adelinde's delicious dinners, which he'd gratefully demolished... albeit a bit quicker than would probably be considered socially acceptable.

and with dinner polished off, it was time to go.

"what did i do this time? did i forget my table manners?"

usually, diluc is keen to maintain his personal space, to ensure that kaeya stays as far from him as possible, but the grasp upon his shoulder seems as though it's meant to keep him from leaving rather than to usher him out any faster.

an uncomfortable silence follows.

once, it had been natural to see the two ragnvindr boys joined at the hip. whether squeezed into rib-breaking hugs, or linked arm-in-arm as they socialised with friends and family, the two of them practically came as a unit.

only rarely, they'd have a brief spat and suddenly part from one another like feuding cats, but never had they been apart like this. not for this long.

they always drifted back together eventually.

and that's exactly what people said, following the death of their father. but too much stood between them, now. too many years. too much distance. too much said -- and then too much unsaid.

so it comes as a surprise even to kaeya himself when his arms suddenly fold themselves around diluc's frame, squeezing him tight. his face disappears into a broad shoulder, and he doesn't even think to breathe for a couple of seconds, too distracted by the comforting familiarity of his scent.

and then it hits, like a pile of bricks. a long, grievous wail escapes his chest -- one that he'd held onto for years, because there had been no shoulder for him to cry on. no justice for their family. no home to return to. no brother to celebrate the rest of his milestones with.

diluc must have hated him. diluc must still hate him, if he had the strength to keep his little brother at arms length when the other could no longer bear it.

kaeya would hate himself, too, if he were in his shoes.

"i'm sorry, 'luc. i-- i don't know why i'm like this."

but even now, spluttering out his apologies, he just can't bring himself to let go.

[t-lostinworlds]

Warm Winter & Fiery Frost | B.Barnes [Completed]

》 PAIRING: bucky barnes x ex-HYDRA assassin!female!reader

》 TROPE/GENRE: grumpy x grumpy, enemies to lovers-ish, slow burn-ish, angst, fluff-ish

》 SUMMARY: They say opposites attract. You and Bucky were so alike—He was called The Winter Soldier and you were called Frost, for fucks sake—that it's probably the reason why you hated each other. Or was it the denying of powerful feelings in fear of getting hurt? You know, like how the cliché goes. Because you know what they also say: There's a fine line between love and hate.

》 WARNINGS: canon typical violence (blood, guns, combat, etc.), canon divergence, meanness against each other (at the start & that one scene™), emotional constipation! (on both sides. they both need therapy lbr), poorly translated russian prolly, soulmate vibes (not really?), r has bucky at knifepoint quite often (& threatens to kill him), bucky's kink unlocked? (not explored lol), down bad!bucky, r has a backstory, mentions of: past traumas, grooming (no specific ages but it's implied that r was very young), manipulation, experimentation, child trafficking, torture, murder (u know hydra tings), a sweet, happy and open ending (+ if i missed anything pls let me know!)

》 TOTAL WORD COUNT: 29k+ (my longest fic yet)

A/N: i actually started this a year ago??? (according to my doc) which is crazy to me?? bc it feels like i only had this idea for months? where has the time gone. ANYWAYS. first behemoth bucky fic & first fic in a few months so pls be kind ksksks

++ also would like to say that r in this isn't the usual happy-go-lucky, sweet, emotionally capable, sunshine-y person compared to what i typically write but she has her reasons. cold & hardened but mushy on the inside. u know. like our fave supersoldier. they're honestly the same person just different fonts lmao. ANYWAYS,

++ additional note: tumblr has a limit of only 1000 paragraphs (or text block so to speak). the fic itself is 1300 paragraphs so it's waay over the limit. so i decided to cut it into two parts BUT i also posted it on AO3 if you want to read it as a whole already. hope you guys still read and enjoy it! <3

📍 BLOG NAVIGATION ✩ B. BARNES MASTERLIST ✩ MAIN MASTERLIST ✩

⊱ ─────.⋅♚ *｡･ﾟ.★. *｡･ﾟ✫*.

PART ONE | PART TWO

or READ ON AO3

✫*ﾟ･ﾟ｡.★.*｡･ﾟ♛ *.

↬ thank you for reading lovely! reblog & leave a comment if you enjoyed! feedback is always appreciated! ++ consider supporting me on ko-fi if you can!

✉ NO TAGLIST: go follow @t-lostinlibrary​​​​ and turn on notifications to get updated on my works!

© t-lostinworlds, 2024 ✘ I do NOT give any permission to repost, translate, & use any of my works (writings, gifs, dividers, etc.) on any platform, with credit or otherwise. Please respect that. Thank you.

[betterthanyalls]

Can u do a Reader x epic various where y/n is apart of Ody's crew and during the end of thunder bringer Zeus kidnaps y/n and takes them to Olympus instead of letting them either drown or get washed up onto Calypso's island?🥰🥰🤩🤩 It'd be cool if during God games or something Athena finds out what Zeus did and now instead of the games being just to free Ody from Calypso's island, it's ALSO about freeing y/n from Olympus and reuniting them with Odysseus?? Sorry if this doesn't make sense or if it's too much work lol, just write this however you want if you even wanna write it at all teehee ^^"

blinks i think i went through 37 different emotions while writing this, most of them were bad. Ok so, I'm not sure how good this is but please don't kill me😇 TW: Zeus gives reader Ganymede treatment

Masterlist

Stolen Soldier

Various (kind of) x Reader

EPIC: The Musical ~ Oneshot ~ Angst

Words: 1.6K

Published: 11-4-2024

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thunder roared, winds whipped, and waves rocked the lone ship back and forth. Standing on the bow of the ship was a figure of divine power and presence, waiting with a wicked grin. “Choose,” the king of the gods demanded harshly.

“Choose?” Odysseus muttered, looking at Zeus in fear. “Someone’s got to die today, and you have got the final say. You,” he pointed to Odysseus before gesturing to the rest of the crew, “or your crew.”

The captain looked to his crew, locking eyes with Y/n—his best friend, his rock, his shelter. He took a shaky breath, looking back to Zeus in desperation.

“Please don’t make me do this; don’t make me do this,” Odysseus begged. His mind seemed to be playing tricks on him. Looking back at his crew, he saw a range of emotions: anger, hurt, terror, grief, and more. Taking a daring glance at his closest friend, the soldier felt his heart shatter. Holding back tears, Y/n gave him a hesitant nod to show it was ok.

Then, a new voice tore his gaze away from his crew. Looking out over the sea and to the clouds, a figure of familiarity seemed to take place within the clouds. Illusion or not, that was his wife.

Penelope. Odysseus took staggering steps across the shaking boat and to the edge. Both of his hands latched to the wooden railing, his eyes never moving from the clouded position of his partner. Memories flooded his judgment, from his crew and Y/n, to his family waiting for him. “Captain?” A voice of uncertainty spoke up. Eurylochus. The said captain couldn’t even dare face his right-hand man as the sky darkened and Penelope faded back to the clouds.

“I have to see her," Odysseus whispered, tears brimming in his eyes as he finally looked back at his crew. The general saw all of the hurt and betrayal in his men’s expressions. The fear hurt the most to see. “But we’ll die,” Eurylochus pleaded. Odysseus knew he would regret this option until his final breath. Once he got home, how would he tell Ctimene he was the cause of her husband's death? “I know,” Odysseus’ voice broke, a few stray droplets not belonging to the storm washed down his cheeks. 

At the end of those words, the thunder roared, and Zeus grinned evilly. Zeus rose above the clouds, lightning moving to gather in his raised hand.

“Thunder, bring her through the wringer.” The crew drew their weapons in defense, charging towards Odysseus with murderous intent. Y/n stood away from the fight, not daring to lift any sort of weapon against her best friend.

“Show her I'm the judgment call. The one who makes her kingdom fall. Lightning, wield her, use and yield her.” 

As the crew closed in on their captain, the air started to become tense and electrified. Y/n took a step back from the chaos, looking up to see a phenomenon of heavenly power. “Show her what she can’t conceal; her true nature will be revealed.”

A bright light enclosed the surrounding sky, ripping down to the center of the ship. In an instant, a deafening crack sounded, and all light faded to black. Y/n felt like her soul was being ripped apart as she opened her mouth to scream her pain, but no noise came out. Then she felt a drop, only to be brought into a suffocating embrace of cold. Finally, her mind cut out. ~~~~~ Y/n felt different. She didn’t sense the shivering water anymore, but instead a subtle warmth. It took a few minutes, but eventually she managed to peek open her eyes. Y/n wasn’t on a ship in the middle of the sea with the night sky above anymore, but instead there was a grand painting on the ceiling of white marble overhead. Looking around slowly, the young woman saw an unfamiliar scene.

A lavish bedroom surrounded her, furnishings a king could only dream of sitting like average decor in each nook and cranny. Moving her hands, Y/n felt the silk sheets of a glorious bed below her. Ivory blankets fell from her body as she slowly rose up from her position. Placing her feet on the cold marble flooring, the mortal stepped through the room. It wasn’t long before she found herself in front of a floor-length mirror. 

White and gold fabric draped down on her body—a dress fit for a goddess of divine origin. Confusion clouded her eyes as she scanned her new attire. That puzzlement was quickly replaced with fear as two wooden doors opened, revealing an even more confusing sight.

A tall man wearing a white toga entered the room without a care of knocking. Striding to where Y/n stood, she instinctively took steps back from him. “My dear, why do you back away?” The smile on his face was unnerving, especially with the nickname. Y/n recognized that voice immediately, terror coursing through her veins as her lips parted to let out a gasp.

“Zeus.”

The god in question continued to walk towards her with that two-faced smile until he backed the mortal into a wall. “Mmm, you’re as smart as you are beautiful,” he took her hand, placing a kiss on her knuckles. Y/n shuddered in disgust and fear; her heart raced faster than a chariot racer's steeds. She wanted to push him away, but her body felt locked in place. Y/n tried to speak, but her lips were closed tightly like a stone wall. “Hm, dear, I think I know a dress that’d fit your body much better. Let me help.”

~~~~~

Within only the second morning of the Heavenly Palace, Y/n had the overwhelming urge to jump off. But she wouldn’t be allowed such a pleasure with the god at her side. Zeus had taken it upon himself to guide the mortal on a tour through Olympus, which only influenced her thoughts. 

Y/n kept her eyes on Zeus every second. Not out of intrigue or anything of that sort, but of apprehension. Each movement of his that was near her direction, the mortal would tense up and pause everything. Soon enough, the king of Olypmus noticed and grinned with faux comfort. “Dear, you seem tense. Allow me to ease you.” ~~~~~ Day after day. Weeks after week. Zeus never let Y/n leave his side, threatening any god or goddess who even dared to give her a sympathetic glance. The woman was a shell of who she once was. Her eyes sunk and her soul depleted; she felt her life draining by the day. Not in mortality-wise, no Zeus would never let her perish. But in consideration of her spirit.

Each night she would cry until no more salt would leave, leaving only choking sobs. Each night she was infiltrated by the king of Olympus. Y/n would stare at herself in the mirror, vomit building in her throat as her eyes trailed down to every mark on her body. No spot was untouched. No matter how hard she tried, Y/n could never wash off the sin. The mortal would scrub her skin until she was raw and bleeding, but the phantom touches remained.

Each night she missed her home and friends more and more. Where was Odysseus now? Did he forget all about her when he returned to Ithaca? What about Penelope? Would she miss her best friend? 

Seven years. Seven years of misery, force, and agony. Seven years of physical and mental torture she endured to no fault.

But soon, like all stories, her savior arrived. ~~~~~

Athena stood in front of her father, spear and shield in hand, while staring into the king’s eyes murderously.

“I’ve played your game and won. Release them,” the goddess of wisdom demanded, shifting her gaze to where Y/n stood anxiously beside Zeus’ throne. The mortal had gone through so much, and Athena was determined to save her. 

Zeus glowered down at his daughter, rage covering his expression. “You dare to defy me? To make me feel shame?” He growled, his fists clenching so tight that his knuckles turned a bright alabaster. “No one beats me; no one wins my game!”

The lightning god stood up threateningly, his hands glowing a static yellow. “Thunder, bring her through the wringer!” The air was caught in Y/n’s throat at the familiar words, her eyes wide in horror. Zeus rose up, the electricity in his hands growing as the woman noticed the alarmed looks on the other god’s expressions. “Show her I’m the judgment call, the one who makes her kingdom FALL!” With a vociferous burst, he threw the lightning at his daughter, forcing her back onto the floor. Once the light faded, everyone looked to see the warrior lying face down, her body still as ice. “Is she dead?” the voice of her brother Ares asked hesitantly. Y/n thought back to every moment her and Odysseus had been with Athena. They were an unstoppable force together. Now though, Y/n only wanted to rush to the goddess side.  Before anyone could do anything, Athena struggled to her feet, holding her aegis in defense while pointing the spear tip to her father.

Zeus’ look of utter shock soon turned to rage at her defiance. In response, he sent a barrage of bolts towards his favorite child. Against this attack, the war patroness held her shield strong and pushed against the force, making her way to her father.

Finally, at the feet of the king, she grabbed his arm and fell to her knees.

“Let them go, please. Let them go.” Her plea was finished as the goddess collapsed, her breath slowing to a stop.

[s0rinsleeps]

Twit cap: What if I went full TLOU ellie mode to protect my sister and u knew and didn’t tell the cops bcs u think I’m sooo sexy and sooo mysterious

ALOT OF DETAILS IF U WANT THEM UNDER THE CUT

Very very random spontaneous au moment!!

•Vander let’s vi/pow live in a secluded cabin in the woods to get them away from his shady lifestyle (he wants to quit but silco and Co. want him dead) anyway vi does her best to protect them both but unfortunately Powder gets kidnapped. (They want to use her as leverage against Vander) And well,, vi as said above, does what she has to do to get her sis back. Brutally. In her rage she fucks up and leaves incriminating evidence behind, so, desperate, she goes to the only other person she knows.

•Caitlyn learns abt this and decides to protect Vi and fuck up evidence to help vi hide. Vi feels guilty for letting Caitlyn get caught up in her mess but caitlyn tbh doesn’t gaf (we Stan a morally questionable woman) and she just wants silco and co captured./ they r wanted for. A numerous amount of things, drugs, murder, etc.

•(Also vi befriended Caitlyn a bit before this happened. I was thinking that the two met after Cait caught Powder practicing her marksmanship in the woods. Caitlyn is a detective for the local town and is curious abt the two. Although a bit moreso of the scary woman who looks like she’s never seen a bed in her life lol.)

-Was also thinking of giving Vander and vi a unstable/complicated relationship. ?

•Vi loves Vander like a father (classic he took them in at a very young age blah blah) but still hates the fact that her and powder have been dragged into all this, also he kind is bad dad (sorry) and doesn’t know how to give vi the emotional support she needs/she still becomes basically a mom for powder since he’s usually never home.

-Vander is trying his best, very much reflective of how he is in canon. The whole, ‘I’m trying to keep u alive but it’s not enough to keep ur innocence safe’ thing.

Also Vander is worried about the fact Silco now knows of his kiddos, and seems to have shown an interest in powder (while she was kidnapped she offed some guys which showed off her talent with a gun and silco was like wow cool I could use that)

-also silco was present but pow nor Vi saw him/ he was quickly hidden by sevika after VI started going ham on his goons.

•Powder(nickname jinx, she still has a lot of mental issues but she’s getting treated so she’s not ..that bad) takes a liking to caitlyn when she realizes that she wouldn’t rat them out to the cops and also the classic ‘they both can shoot!’ Thing, I’m sucker for caitlyn and pow bonding

(Also potential for powder trying to get vi and cait together because she wants Vi to have someone to rely on that isn’t Vander and also sees VI’s too nervous/self deprecating to make a move on her obvious crush) :p

Anyway that’s all I thought of rn!! Idek if I’ll draw more of this I just got carried away a little with the writing hahaha

[sadseungmin]

not sure if u do yandere content but yandere!felix that’s sweet and kind at first but after he lures u in he shows his true colours that he’s actually sadistic, manipulative and isolating after he finds out u have hanging out with ur male friends for way too long.

also can i be 🎧 anon? :D

♡ dating a yandere lee felix ♡

yandere lee felix x afab reader | dead dove | nsfw (MDNI)

p.s. i hope this is to your liking, 🎧! if you're not too shy, tell me in my dms, ok?

p.s.s. and of course you can be 🎧 anon! ^^

⚠︎ tw: mentioned forced breeding, physical violence, & murder

『 ↳♡･ﾟ yandere!felix is sweet & kind...until he isn't. ೃ⁀➷

Felix, with his charming smile, galaxy of freckles, and endearing demeanor, effortlessly captures hearts. To all who know him, he is the epitome of kindness and warmth, a beacon of light that draws everyone in—including you. However, beneath this sweet exterior lies a dark, obsessive nature that he meticulously conceals until he discovers you've been spending too much time with your male friends.

"Why do you need male friends? Aren't I enough for you, darling?"

♡ *̥˚ yandere!felix lures you in *̥˚ ♡

Felix's initial approach is nothing short of perfect. He showers you with affection, attention, and thoughtful gestures that make you feel like the center of his universe. He listens intently, remembers every detail, and always seems to know exactly what to say to make you smile. Felix is patient, never rushing the relationship, instead allowing it to blossom naturally—or so it seems.

What exactly about Felix lures you in...?

yandere!felix is charming & attentive: he makes sure every interaction is meaningful, creating a sense of deep connection.

yandere!felix makes thoughtful gestures: small gifts, surprise dates, and heartfelt compliments are his tools to win over your heart.

yandere!felix is patient & understanding: he gives you space and never pressures you, creating an illusion of a healthy respectful relationship.

"I saw this necklace and just had to get it for you. It's your birthstone, isn't it? The shade of the gem matches your eyes perfectly, darling. You should wear it to our picnic date later today. Oh, I didn't tell you? I planned for us to have a late lunch by the Han River!"

♡ *̥˚ yandere!felix shows his true colors *̥˚ ♡

Felix's façade begins to crack when he notices you spending time with your male friends. His once subtle jealousy soon morphs into an all-consuming obsession. The mere thought of anyone else having your attention drives him to the brink, revealing a darker side he had carefully hidden.

How does Felix show his true colors...?

yandere!felix uses subtle manipulation: Felix starts to express slight discomfort whenever you mention your male friends, planting seeds of doubt and guilt.

yandere!felix is showing increased possessiveness: He becomes more clingy, insisting on spending more time together and subtly discouraging interactions with others.

yandere!felix makes veiled threats: Felix's sweet words take on a sharper edge, hinting at the consequences of betraying his trust.

"I don't like you hanging out with them. It's obvious they want to take you away from me! They only spend time with you because they want to defile you—they want to fuck you. Do I need to put a baby in you, darling? Do I need to pump your cunt full of my cum to give a nine-month reminder to your little friends that you're mine and only mine?"

♡ *̥˚ yandere!felix is sadistic, manipulative, & wants to isolate you *̥˚ ♡

Once Felix feels he has secured your trust and affection, his true nature begins to emerge. He no longer hides his jealousy and possessiveness, instead using them as tools to control and isolate you.

How does Felix demonstrate these three traits...?

yandere!felix uses isolation tactics: Felix gradually cuts off your contact with your friends and family, using guilt trips and emotional manipulation. He convinces you that no one truly understands, loves, or cares for you like he does.

yandere!felix has sadistic tendencies: Felix takes pleasure in your discomfort and fear. he may resort to psychological torture, such as gaslighting, to make you doubt your own sanity and rely solely on him.

yandere!felix is manipulatively controlling: He carefully monitors your every move, controlling who you talk to, where you go, and what you do. Any act of defiance is met with punishment, disguised as concern for your well-being.

"Darling, you're being irrational and hurting my feelings. I only want what's best for you. If I were the 'sick individual' you claim I am, I wouldn't care to protect you from those losers you call friends. They don't love you; they don't care about you like I do. They wouldn't die for you like I would. There's no one in this world who can love you better than myself, sweetheart."

♡ *̥˚ yandere!felix is a psychopath *̥˚ ♡

Felix's possessiveness continues to escalate to terrifying levels, and he decides a more permanent solution is needed to ensure you remain his forever. His mask shatters completely, revealing a violent and murderous psychopath.

How do you know Felix is a violent & murderous psychopath...?

yandere!felix uses physical violence to instill fear & intimidation: Felix's temper becomes unpredictable and flares uncontrollably, with outbursts of anger that keeps you in a constant state of fear and submission. He begins to physically harm you, using your fear and pain to assert his dominance. Bruises (on your face, neck, torso, and limbs) and cuts (on your thighs, torso, and back) become a grim reminder of his control.

yandere!felix has muderous intent: Unable to tolerate any perceived threat to his relationship, Felix finally resorts to murder. He meticulously plans and executes the killings of your male friends, ensuring that they never come between he and you ever again. His murders are not crimes of passion but cold, calculated acts. He ensures that no evidence can trace back to him, using his charm and ethereal good looks to maintain an alibi and an innocent image.

yandere!felix uses psychological torture: Felix will taunt you with knowledge of his crimes, using your fear and guilt to further isolate and control you. He revels in your terror, taking sadistic pleasure in your helplessness.

"I got you a gift as an apology for slapping you earlier; it's a ring. You know I love you more than life itself, right? It hurts me more than it does you when I have to physically correct you. Anyway, the ring looks familiar, hm? Your friend—Chan, I think his name is—came over looking for you during your nap time. He accused me of keeping you hostage and said you're afraid of me. And, well, he threatened to get the cops involved if I didn't let him see you. So, I had to kill him. But before I disposed of his body, I noticed this ring. I think it will look much better on your finger than it ever did on his. Silver complements your skin tone so beautifully. Oh, y/n, don't cry! He was going to have you taken away from me. Chan left me no choice, darling."

[spacexseven]

tunaaaaa I've been reading ur Childe Thing sooo much that I've been thinking of I Love Amy aus nonstop. its a problem. in honor of bsd s4 im gonna rapid fire a couple out for the Bsd Boys!

lets talk dazai. I feel like this could go a lot of ways with him. like, if its ada dazai, you probably don't really get the sense that something is kinda off with him until you're a bit too deep to back out. he seemed so sweet when you first met- fuckin weird, but sweet! no harm in trying to help him win over a crush, right? for pm dazai, you obviously know hes fucked in the head the second you meet him, so you agree to help him out of a fear of what he might do to you if you dont rather than a sense of altruism. either way, its kinda hard to notice him getting a little overly-attached to you just cuz of how naturally obnoxious and clingy he is. even if he starts to escalate you might not get it cuz hes pretty fast and loose about LITERALLY kidnapping you and tying you up in his apartment/mafia holding cell right off the bat (gets very pouty about you "ignoring" him). doesnt help that hes so out of touch with his own emotions he probably doesn't even know he has a thing for you for a whiiile. trust me tho, being nice to him and taking care of him when hes sick or injured WILL wear him down. you'll only kind of get it when you try to give him some new pointers on his crush and he seems to just get? annoyed? mutters something about you talking about someone else while you're SUPPOSED to pay attention to HIM. or when he keeps being weirdly affectionate with you in full view of X when hed usually forget you exist as soon as he sees them. or you woke up chained to a chair (again) but this time hes perched in your lap and scolding you about avoiding your "boyfriend" before shoving his lips against yours. couldve been any of these occasions really.

cant BELIEVE I didn't think of gogol the first time I talked about this this is almost EXACTLY what yes doing to sigma rn. when this fuckin 6'2 clown terrorist traps you against a wall and starts questioning about why you were talking to "his darling", you are 10000% sure you're gonna die. almost gives you whiplash how fast his tone changes once you convince him you have NO interest. all smiles all of the sudden, picks u up under the armpits like a cat to right ur posture and pats you on the head, declaring that you will be his magicians assistant for a while! you do not have a say in this, if you'd like to keep your skin. while you feel bad about aiding and abetting this stalking case, you get the sense that hes. not ever gonna actually make a move. kinda just Wants To Stalk. goes on about how he cant let himself be tied down like that (whatever that means). he does talk about just murdering his darling a lot but you've managed to convince him that thats unnecessary baggage connecting them to him so hopefully that keeps him sated until his goldfish-esque attention span finally moves him onto a new target. and it does! the problem is that its you. I think that once he realizes he likes you, he's just gonna vanish. poof gone. hes had a lot of fleeting obsessions with ill-fated darlings before, but youre something new. hes never actually gotten to know someone before! ugh. hes caged by his feelings for you, but the despair hed feel from killing you would be a cage all its own! frustrating!!!!! maybe if he just leaves and never thinks about you ever again this'll just go away like all of his other crushes. doesnt work. expect him back in a month, snuggling into your neck and babbling inane about having missed you. he tied you up again so youre just gonna have to let him do that. its fine youre used to this with him.

really wanted to do this with chuuya and fyodor too but im scared of them being OOC help me.

- 🩹

omg so this turned out to be Very Long :O quick context for any1 who is unfamiliar w i love amy—it's a webtoon (highly recommend btw) where the yandere character starts to fall for her 'target/rival' instead of her initial love interest. for more info + the childe version, check out this post.

cw: yandere characters (dazai, fyodor, nikolai), stalking, kidnapping, imprisonment, obsessive behavior, threats of violence to reader. (this whole post came off a little silly instead of serious But mind the cws anyway!)

this is best read with a male reader (to keep it consistent w i love amy) but there's no pronouns used or descriptions for reader, so do as you like. also, reader makes morally questionable decisions :>

(pm) dazai is to be avoided at all costs. that was the rule you put down for yourself after witnessing one of his very public threats to some poor pedestrian who had bumped into him. the dramatic coat, the blank expression, the natural ease with which he handled the weapon in his hand—everything about him was just...alarming.

however, despite all your efforts, he's obstructed your path home with a deadly glare and a hand in his pocket.

according to dazai, he did not appreciate your recent conversation with X, (as he claimed, they were too popular to spare most people more than a few friendly greetings—so why were you having a full-fledged conversation with them?) who were you, even, to get in his way? you sputter out some excuse, some explanation as to why he misunderstood the situation and it was all just work-related, and fortunately, he seems convinced, at least enough to relax his hold on you and shift the blaring malice in his stance to something less frightening.

obviously, you couldn't refuse when he offers you what he calls a mutually beneficial proposition. you help him get closer to X, and he won't kill you! win-win, don't you think?

the thing about dazai, you soon learn, is that despite the murderous energy he gives off, he's painfully annoying, more so than frightening. it almost feels like you're dealing with an obnoxious child, with how he's constantly whining and tugging at your sleeve and complaining about how useless you're being.

and it also makes you wonder if he's ever really had a friend, because he's got some strange expectations for you. he's all too possessive, too paranoid, and expects you to be perfectly fine with it. you consider telling him that he's not supposed to hold you hostage every time he thinks you're spending "too much time with someone else", but after the 4th attempt, you've understood that there was no getting to him. at least he stopped with the threats to your other friends (well, he promised you that he'd stop), and that seemed like the only thing he was willing to compromise on. he doesn't ease up on the breaking-into-your-room-to-visit-you stunt, either, especially when you're "ignoring him". despite all that, maybe out of some form of pity, you still help him out. you drop off food when he's sick and try to explain that imprisonment is not the key to a healthy relationship. you hang out with him even if you're terrified of all the mafioso you come across when you visit the hq with him, and after all of it, you're mostly convinced that he wasn't going to kill you anytime soon. in fact, the two of you seemed to be building an unusual friendship.

but when he comes to visit you one day when you're sick and actually knocks on the door and texts you beforehand, you tell him that this would be the best way to approach X if he ever hears that they're sick. though you're expecting some excitement, or some self-satisfaction for improving a little, instead of looking excited, dazai looks frustrated. for the first time, he looks genuinely...upset. and when he asks you why you can't appreciate that he was looking out for you and not X, you're left at a loss for words. you're not sure if this was a sign that he was starting to learn not to cross your boundaries or a warning that he was beginning to like you a little too much

and things only get stranger. he becomes more observant, asks you more questions about yourself rather than X, and even starts holding your hand in full view of X. when you mention that X was really looking forward to a new movie coming out and that he should try to ask them out, he gets upset by your suggestion, grumbling about you paying more attention to X and only caring about them instead of asking him if he wants to see the movie with them. so, unsure of how to respond, you echo his question. he beams at you and happily declares that he only wants to watch the movie with you.

somewhere along the line, it happened that dazai himself started to realize just how much he liked you, and he spirals out of control. the already overwhelming physical contact turns more intimate, with dazai holding your hand at every possible moment, pressing himself as close to you as humanely possible without squeezing the air out of you, and sitting on your lap whenever the opportunity presents itself. he stops responding to anything that isn't an endearing pet name and introduces himself as your boyfriend. X seems to be eradicated from his mind, as well as anyone that wasn't you, though it feels as though you're the only one that has a problem with this change. dazai takes to it naturally, seamlessly inserting himself into your life.

"what's wrong?" dazai's sprawled across your lap with the biggest grin on his face, the remote in your hand long ripped away by him, "come give your boyfriend a kiss~"

you've...heard of fyodor. it was more overhearing whispers shared between people, but the mention of his name seemed to intrigue everyone who heard it. you've heard that he was a mysterious man who walked into the city one day and never left, and you've heard that he was the owner of an expensive casino. you've even heard that he had a tendency to stand on top of rooftops at night, but you've heard tons of variations and rumors. one statement, however, rang true in everyone's ears.

fyodor dostoevsky was taken with X.

that was putting it lightly—obsession was exactly what it was. though X was clearly unaware of what was being said, because, as they assured you one day while you walked out with them, fyodor was just a friend! and he was a very interesting guy, with some strong beliefs. he wasn't some criminal mastermind! all he did was keep to himself. and that, as they confidently declared, wasn't a crime.

but you had reason to not believe X, after all, it wasn't them at the receiving end of a laser focused gaze and a creepy smile. (it scared you so much that you ran home and ordered a burglar-proof lock for your door the same night) and it also wasn't them who sat down across from you while you were having your breakfast in the café nearby. anyone would have been better than who it was.

"hello," fyodor waves a fork at you, his fingers positioned gracefully on the silver cutlery (and of course, you think bitterly, he was evil and beautiful. just your luck), "i hope you can spare me a few minutes."

he wasn't asking, but you melted at his soft tone. for all people loved to talk about him, why hadn't they mentioned how hard it was to take your eyes off him? awkwardly, you take another bite of your food, nodding at him.

he asks you about X, though it's more of an interrogation disguised as casual conversation. he easily waves around his fork, smiles at you with an unnerving expression, and stares at you a little too long. by the end of it, your food is finished and his fork is placed neatly back onto the table and you've sustained no injuries. better yet, he finally seems to have (reluctantly) removed your name from his hit list.

what you weren't expecting was for him to start seeking you out. you get strange looks when fyodor waits outside your workplace with an umbrella—your umbrella—leaving you with no choice but to walk with him unless you wanted to get home soaked. he lists off X's habit and asks you to add on to his list, ignoring your reply of "that's just creepy". he tells you that he wants to respect X's privacy by not using cameras to spy on them so will you answer him or should he use the cameras? and what else could you do then?

at the very least, he didn't seem serious about attempting to kidnap or imprison X. he seemed fascinated by them, if anything. like he was...studying them. being with him wasn't as bad as you'd though, no matter how much you hated to admit it, despite the foundation of this friendship was built on how amusing he found X. if he was in a particularly good mood, he'd even offer to help you out with your struggles in the pursuit of love. his ideas, however, were all sure to land you behind bars with a retraining order to boot. when you voiced your opinion to him, he only smiled and told you that he knew a thing or two about breaking out of a prison cell, much like he was recalling upon a fond memory.

the only good thing about this strange arrangement was that fyodor was really nice to look at. there was something mesmerizing about his every action, even the slight quirk of his lips or the way his hair fell on his forehead. the ease with which he slipped on his hat (which, by the way, what was with all his not-weather-appropriate clothing? was he not sweating?), and the commanding air around him. so while he spoke seriously about X and his distaste for most of the human population, you tuned him out and focused on admiring his pretty eyes and how his lips wrapped around his fork and—ugh, you were starting to sound as creepy as him. but honestly, you had a feeling he already knew that you found him attractive. fyodor was far too good at reading people, far too perceptive to let something as obvious as your attraction to him slip.

your mistake was foolishly believing that you'd be safe as long as you didn't act on those feelings.

it felt strange, however, when he started reaching your usual table first, having already asked for your go-to meal and watching with thinly veiled delight as you stared down at the hot plate. and it's your coworkers now that get stared at, your friends who get the silent threat of a fork pressed against smooth skin, and you that everyone whispers that fyodor dostoevsky is taken with.

the meaning behind his increasingly strange behaviour doesn't really hit you, not until you've bumped into X again, who you haven't seen around in a while.

"i see that you and fyodor are becoming good friends now," they grin, "i'm almost jealous of how quickly you warmed up to him."

long fingers reach to caress your cheek before a perfectly poised hand places itself on your shoulder. fyodor's unmistakable voice replies in your stead.

"we're friends? is that what you've heard?" fyodor dips his head down to lock eyes with yours, "why don't you correct them about that, darling?"

you should have trusted sigma when he told you that nikolai gogol was bad news. as he clarified, so bad that, coincidentally, the ministry of justice hq was moved away at least by two states when nikolai came to visit.

but how were you to know that he was in love with one of your acquaintances? and how were you to know that his idea of love was this frightening? just when you were making your way back after a lukewarm conversation about work with X, you were slammed up against the wall by a person with a top hat and a coat and an honestly terrifying expression. then nikolai, as he later introduced himself, started grilling you with questions, ruthlessly asking about why you were with X and why did they smile at you and where does your family live, after which he happily told you about his many previous experiences with torture and how he would love to show you.

you're not sure what convinced him to let you go, whether it was your trembling legs or your teary promises that you had no interest in X in that way, but here you were now—alive, terrified, and offered the position of 'magician's assistant' (though the magician himself refused to tell you why the position was open for so long) and all it took to land the increasingly strange job was to talk to X and listen to nikolai threaten to torture you in graphic detail.

(among all the crazy people you had seen around here—that so-called 'world's best detective' who snatched your bag of candy right from your hands, that other person who started doing push-ups in the middle of the road, and someone giggling holding a bag of lemons by the port—you thought that nikolai definitely fit right in. not that you were going to tell him that)

while the position wasn't exactly what you wanted, nor were you too keen on spending more time around nikolai, something about the glint in his uncovered eye and the hand gripping your shoulder told you that you really wouldn't want to reject his offer. contrary to what you may have assumed, assisting nikolai only meant becoming a partner to his criminal activity, which revolved around stalking X, talking to them to find out all the information nikolai can't get by stalking them, and stalking them even more to find out any more details that neither of you could get. (you've considered helping out as much as you can, leaving hints in the form of obscure drawings of nikolai and danger symbols, but later, when you catch sight of X waving to him, you realize the message did not come across the way you intended it to)

fortunately for them, (and for you. at least now, you won't be behind bars for assisting in abduction) nikolai seems to have no interest whatsoever in pursuing them any further. sure, he keeps books filled with information about X, and buys their favorite drink alongside his order, but he doesn't seem to want to do anything more.

while you could care less about why he does whatever he's doing, already chalking it all up to the fact that he was off his rockers, nikolai decides to enlighten you all the same. when he excitedly rambles on and on about freedom and feelings and why X must now die, you pretend to listen, never actually telling him that nothing he said made any sense to you. still, after insisting that he won't be very free behind bars either and that if he really didn't want to be tied down by his feelings, he should actually distance himself from them instead, it appeared that you finally got him to understand, and he hesitantly agreed to listen.

for the most part, everything is great after that. your life returns to normal, with no top hat wearing, cane wielding magician in the vicinity, and no more having to invade someone's privacy. and it was great! really! even if it was a little bit boring without nikolai's spontaneous plans (maybe that time in the amusement park was pretty fun, even if the only reason you had to go was because X was going there with someone else, much to nikolai's horror). there was something both unsettling and addictive about the crazy adventures nikolai swept you on, though it was for the best that he disappeared.

but then nikolai came back…acting a little odd.

his clinginess and a sudden desire for physical affection set off alarms in your head, though he acted like this was perfectly normal. at first, you told yourself that this must be some new jealousy plot—maybe he got this idea from a tv show he watched over his 'break', but he hadn't asked you if you wanted to be part of this ploy (not that he ever did, really).

and your suspicions only grew when he refused to let up on the act, holding onto you as if his life depended on it. his trips with you became increasingly frightening, and his grip on you increasingly tighter. he takes his new position by your side, not at all focused on X anymore, and instead observes you with the same look that was fixated on X not too long ago.

it only hits you that you've become his new target when you find yourself tied up to a chair, with him seated right in front of you with his face up to yours. the exact scenario you convinced him not to put X through.

"your advice sucks, by the way," he pouts, "i tried staying away but i couldn't stop thinking of you! don't be too upset, alright? we can have even more fun now that we're together!"

[chickentendrsanfries]

Misia and Pampinea's relationship is so toxic but I think it's actually the best portrayal of a trauma bond I've ever seen portrayed in media (and I am referring to the actual definition of trauma bond, meaning "a bond formed between an abuser and their victim", not the common usage meaning "people who bond by experiencing the same traumatic event together")

Like you see Misia's love for Pampinea, and worse, you see why she loves Pampinea. Pampinea uses a very common but very underrepresented form of emotional manipulation to make herself look needy, pathetic, and dependent upon Misia's help. The audience genuinely believes the few moments when Pampinea acts loving and kind towards Misia, and I think sometimes Pampinea actually intends to be genuine, but using Misia is so second-nature at this point that she's, either consciously or subconsciously, always doing it.

Pampinea fluctuates constantly between being Misia's loving friend, holding her, stroking her hair, and then being distant and cruel to her, always with a soft, pitying voice and a smile, to punish and manipulate her into doing whatever Pampinea wants. She makes Misia genuinely believe she (Pampinea) needs, loves, and would be lost without Misia, that for Misia to exit this relationship would kill Pampinea, a person Misia loves. Nobody can take care of Pampinea like Misia can, least of all Pampinea herself. You can really see how emotionally dependant Misia is on Pampinea, especially after her girlfriend dies in the first episode. This story takes place during the fucking P L A G U E. Everyone is losing everyone they love constantly, and for a while Pampinea is all Misia has, to throw her love and energy into. You can see that her forming a relationship with Filomena is the first step to breaking free from this emotional dependence, but even that on it's own isn't enough.

I mean for fuck's sake, Pampinea offers Misia to mourn her dead girlfriend together, she does a whole little funeral with her and offers her support, friendship, and comfort as a noble to Misia, a lowly handmaiden, and you almost think "wow, maybe on some level she really does care about Misia" only to realize she only did it to coerce Misia into murdering someone, an act which traumatizes and wreaks psychological havoc on her already fragile mental state.

It's a portrayal of a kind of abuse that isn't often shown in media, which tends to lean towards the angle of "look at this stupid pathetic sad sack, their (always romantic, usually heterosexual) partner beats them up but they still think they love them because they're so manipulated into thinking they're worthless on their own, and I, the narrative, despite portraying this as a bad thing, am also unintentionally corroborating that by giving them no characterization beyond "Battered Victim in need of rescuing by Other (usually male romantic interest) Protagonist."" Misia has a character outside of her relationship to Pampinea, and more importantly you see why she loves her and why she stays. It's like she says, "Love isn't just one dimension. Love has long claws." Her love has ensnared her in Pampinea's grasp.

When I first watched it, I thought Misia murdering Pampinea was overkill and I was shocked and felt it out of character for her to have done that (especially considering how she did it, fucking WOOF) but upon reconsideration, it's a perfect culmination of everything we've seen of their relationship. Pampinea, for years, convinced Misia that she needed her, that she would die without her. So, when Misia finally decides to sever that relationship, it makes sense that she thinks Pampinea couldn't live without her, so she might as well kill her. Additionally, I think there's an implication that Misia would always be tethered to Pampinea if she were alive, that those claws were sunk so deep she could never guarantee her own emotional safety if Pampinea was around. Further, Pampinea at this point tried to make Misia burn an innocent woman to death in order to kidnap her child and lay claim to her estate, so for Misia to burn her to death instead is poetic in a way, a fitting end. And lastly, Pampinea used Misia's trust and love her whole life, and in her last action, Misia flips the script and uses Pampinea's love and trust to end her life.

"What would I ever do without you?"

"We'll never know, viscontessa."

[twoa-plus]

dissecting stanford pines and finding organs that don’t exist but like in a metaphorical way

that’s it that’s the title i’m going with. this is a long one folks o7

most of this isn’t sourced or canon at all it’s just personal interpretation/headcanon/whatever else u wanna call it, but!! since more people are seeing my deranged gravity falls ramblings now i figure i should probably give some perspective as to why i like/defend ford as much as i do

(in my other gf posts i do try to stick to canon to back up whatever point i’m making - this is just about my personal opinion of ford as a character, and should be able to be thrown out in regards to my other posts)

so for some background/setup/whatever (it’s important i promise bear with me), different people have different instinctual responses to anxiety/stress. i come from a family (genetics are fun) where the default response is to start (metaphorically ofc) biting and hissing like a cornered animal. this doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any actual hatred or malice or anything towards the people that end up getting scratched - they might just be at the wrong place at the wrong time, they might’ve done something super minor and insignificant that added on to a preexisting pile of stress, etc etc

i cannot stress enough that i am not saying this is ok. you dont need me to tell you that hurting people who don’t deserve it is a bad thing, lol. what i am saying though is that sometimes people can kind of suck for reasons other than just genuinely wanting everyone around them to be miserable

this is the last “background” part i swear BUT another thing thats less genetic and more just me being weird is that i’m the type of person where like. any minor environmental change can really stress me out lol. like even just reorganizing my desk can be pretty emotionally taxing

SO. finally back on topic. stanford pines. i see a lot of the behavior/patterns i just described in him. like i’ve spent my entire life around people like this, and while i understand why a lot of people see him as just some asshole, i can’t help but see him as a guy who’s just kinda going through it lol

just talking about the more recent events as of the series, he’s just spent 30 years god knows where doing and seeing god knows what, he has an abusive ex who wants to murder him and his entire family (plus the whole dimension, really), and in the three decades he’s been gone the entire world - including his own house - has changed and left him behind. add onto that that he went missing in 1982, way before we had all of the emotional/mental health resources we have now, we all saw what the stans’ childhood was like, and that ford is terrible with people - including, imo, himself. if there’s anybody out there who would have Feelings and not understand what they are or where they’re coming from or what to do about them, it’s this guy

this entire setup is the perfect circumstance for fear and anxiety and stress and uncertainty to all get translated into anger. a really big example of this, to me, is how he talks about dipper in journal 3. i’ve talked about this before somewhere so i’ll try to summarize as fast as i can lol

reading his initial entry about dipper would make u think he like. hates this kid lol. but i really don’t think he ever did - he was really excited to meet the kids in the show and already seemed to care about them just by virtue of existing, and his opinion on dipper in journal 3 seems to do a complete 180 pretty quickly which ,,, doesn’t really fit ford as a character. like i love the man but that guy can hold a GRUDGE

here’s how it reads to me:

ford gets back to his home dimension after 30 years and everything is different

he’s subconsciously kind of struggling with the fact that he doesn’t really have a “home” anymore - the sense of familiarity and comfort that would normally come with the word is gone. (i specify that it’s subconscious because, like i said earlier, i do not get the vibe that he’s particularly aware of his own emotions)

he finds out that journal 3 - something he made with his own two hands and considers part of his life’s work - has also changed in the decades he’s been gone. this adds to the feeling of unfamiliarity with the world around him

it’s easier to blame that “final straw” and say that he’s just upset about his work being tampered with rather than address the actual root of the problem, so that’s exactly what he does. this still doesn’t mean that there’s any genuine hatred towards dipper. anger in the moment, yeah, but not hatred

again, this is entirely personal interpretation, and i completely understand if u don’t see it like this!! this is just a pattern of thoughts/behavior that i’m very familiar with, so it’s easy for me to apply it to situations like this even if it’s not really part of the canon

i also think there’s a big problem in this fandom with just ,, not seeing ford as a Person with Emotions? idk how to explain it but it feels like people expect him to always know exactly what to do in every situation just bc he’s old and academically smart. like whenever another character does something objectively bad it’s “well there were extenuating circumstances,” (which is usually true and i agree !!) but ford never really seems to get that treatment. if he does something bad it’s just because he sucks

a big example of this i think is the fight between him and stan (y’know the “you ruined my life”/“you ruined your own life”). you cannot look me dead in the eyes and, in full seriousness, with the context of everything ford was going through with bill at the time, say that he was fully mentally/emotionally stable during that conversation. “oh so you’re blaming stan-“ NO!!! stan was also going through it!!! that’s the entire point - they’re both people with their own lives and emotions and everything else that comes with that, they had very human reactions to their respective situations, and they both ended up hurt!! hopefully i’m explaining this right but i just don’t like it when people pin everything on ford, like there was a lot going on and at the end of the day he’s just a human

wasn’t really sure how to work this in so i’ll just put it here - i don’t think ford ever truly hated stan, either. familial bonds are complicated, and there can be a whole lot of anger towards someone without true hatred being present. i briefly mentioned the stans’ childhood sucking earlier, and i don’t just mean stanley - it’s easier to pinpoint him as a victim of abuse/neglect, but that doesn’t mean ford had it great either. their parents (specifically filbrick, but caryn didn’t exactly do a fantastic job with them either) expected nothing of stan and the world of ford, both of which would weigh heavily on any child. plus, ford being the favorite doesn’t mean all of his emotional needs were met - filbrick seeing him as an opportunity to make money doesn’t mean he was suddenly an emotionally present and caring father towards him. WCT wasn’t just an opportunity for ford to go be a famous scientist or whatever - it was a chance for his father to love him, something both of the stans desperately wanted. (WCT was also on the opposite side of the country from where they lived but i’m sure that’s completely unrelated !!!)

do i think stan deserved anything that happened to him after the science fair incident? no, absolutely not, he was a child. do i think it was right of ford to just stand there as his brother got thrown out? no, absolutely not - but he was a child too. as for them not speaking for a decade after that, like i mentioned earlier ford can hold a grudge like no other. (this doesn’t just apply to stan, either, ford dedicated half of his life to trying to kill his ex lmao.) i think ford’s ability to hold on to anger like that is actually a pretty major part of/flaw in his personality, but again, anger - even the strongest, most long-lived of it - is not synonymous with hatred. stan, who ford has always gone to for help when he truly needed it, it not what ford’s hatred looks like. bill, who ford actively wants to die, is

anyways!! i never know how to close these things lol. ig in summary i just see ford’s behavior (in the show at least) as more of a sign of internal struggle rather than like ,, genuinely hating the people around him and wanting their lives to suck. did/does he have an ego problem? absolutely. is he incapable of love and human connection? no. is he immune to manipulation/abuse/neglect/etc and everything that comes with that? also no

he’s an interdimensional criminal why can’t he go to the theraprism. i think he should

[eddiegotout]

can we PLEASE get eddieravi x unhinged buck fic after u finish presumed dead!eddie bc i honestly dont think anyone can write unhinged buck as you, the vibe is simply NOT THE SAME, you are like modern jesus to me

no i have genuinely been thinking about it. i've been thinking about it a LOT. picture this: buck Literally Refuses to even Conceptualize eddie having gay sex (because obviously if eddie was going to experiment it would be with him?? they literally agreed on this??) (they didn't) (this is also not a normal reaction for buck to have). he entirely blocks the gay eddieravi sex out from his brain.

so what is LEFT is buck being absolutely fucking Crazy about eddie treating ravi with kindness respect and good humor. because ravi is Taking His Spot he's taking EVERYTHING from him??? eddie literally told ravi to come help him set up for dinner. in that stern voice he uses. and ravi stood up and Did it. eddie's stern voice is for BUCK?? that literally Belongs to buck who does ravi think he IS?

eddie lets ravi belay him. buck chews through his lip so hard it goes bloody because ravi won't keep eddie Safe like he does. eddie brings ravi a beer at a cookout at bobby's and DOESN'T bring buck one (because tommy literally just did) (buck could not give less of a fuck about tommy) (he is losing the boyfriend war and eddie and ravi aren't even boyfriends FUCK buck's whole entire stupid life). buck gets so genuinely torn up about it he bursts into tears when ravi offers to drive eddie to the grocery store like Am I So Easily Replaceable To You??? but eddie doesn't see it. because ravi is already driving him to the grocery store.

and again he experiences all these emotions while Actively Blocking Out the fact that eddie is also kissing ravi with tongue and sucking on his neck and that ravi gets to smell eddie's armpits Whenever He Wants and eddie probably puts his hands on ravi's bare skin. and whatever else. because if buck allowed himself to think about that he would murder-suicide himself and ravi.

[pruskita]

Hi hi hello sorry for the bother csn u tell me about your Void in your auu (^^ゞ? thank you so much and sorry for the bother hehe!!

Hellooooo :D

First of all I doubt that he would have talked about Void, only two people know about his Lore, but I'm going to take advantage of this to say his Lore, this will be long.

Okay, let's go with a summary if possible, but it may be very long, I'm so sorry.

From the very beginning, there was nothing, that changed until two beings were created out of nothing and these two became known as Void and Galcatic Nova, They were later classified as gods as they were the first to exist and then both came to represent life and death respectively, Despite what one may initially think that they will come to hate each other for being opposite or because everything that life creates will end up dead, both get along well too good, since at the beginning they both started out as brothers and they still are twin brothers, so they both got excited about what the other did.

Void, apart from being the goddess of life, is considered the creator of all living also as a creator of all types of magic, beings, from the most common bacteria to the most immense constellations, Everything starts most of the time by cell phone that go forming their own path of evolution but Void giving the origin to everything, like the planets, that some let themselves create themselves and others that she created.

But above all, what Void depends on for its existence are the puffs and dark matter that are born from the emotions that Void has or that he absorbs from his surroundings Initially, Void wanted to have only children with her, so that they would be somewhat dependent but also free to live their lives, Although he first wanted to make a combination of both just to have a unique kind of children who were born from positive or negative emotions, but he saw that it was incompatible Since what came out were only creatures that did not show emotions or that soon disappeared, so he thought of dividing his children into two species so that they could live.

As something that is not surprising to many, dark matter is born from the negative emotions that Void has or that she absorbs from the people around her Even though the materials need a little more emotions to be created than the puffs, the Dark Matter themselves can create more of them. On the other hand, Puffs are born from positive emotions and little was needed to give life to a Puff, but Puffs cannot have more of them, it depends on Void to have more of them. And both esovien know that it comes from Void and in its beginnings it was very common to see the subjects with the Puff or the reverse

So let's assume that all is well and all is happy and life and death take their course, that is until the larger communities of ancient times begin to see the two gods as objects of power, Of course they have power, but communities stop seeing them as beings with their own identity and lives and instead see them as figures, a figure that they do not like. Even though they are gods, why should they have the power to give life, magic or have control over all of Hades and death? That was the thought of the ancients and of various communities, they should be the ones to divide the power.

So the powerful people began to spread rumors about both gods, to turn other mortals against both of them, those people who were untruthful or who did not agree with it, they were murdered and disappeared, blaming the gods. But not only spreading rumors about them was enough, they wanted the two under their control and to take away their powers, underneath they all began to create plans. Pallets and armies to catch both gods, no matter how much time will pass, generations will continue to do so and if they left mortals with bad ideas about the gods, about Dark Matter, of the Puff and the knights of Hades better since that way no one could be against them when they go for the gods

The plan finally succeeded after eons and attempts to fail, several lives were lost and they cared less about the lives of always mortals who were going to go after one of the Gods, even though Nova would be the easiest to capture, they still didn't have the Star Dream, so the most logical thing was to go seal Void, if they sealed it Nova would go for her sister so they could capture him in the next few days, maybe even years but they could have the gods

Said, thought and done, they went after the goddess Void to seal her, it was a horrible battle that ended with several planets with several deaths and injuries, terrible consequences, but between Among all the people there were 4 soldiers who gave the coup de grace to end up capturing the goddess, those 4 were later known as the heroes of yore

Well how did you manage to seal a goddess, they themselves knew that it would be impossible to do it with the complete goddess, so they separated her little by little with each attack, they were horrible moments for Void His body was slowly being mutilated and destroyed by those he once saw as his creations, despite his screams and pleas as he defended himself against them all. The tiredness, the exhaustion, the loss of his own power made that in the end the only thing he can do being only a part of his soul stripped of his body is to crawl Without a voice to scream in agony, without being able to see where her attackers were, without being able to hear where the things that hurt her came from, without being able to feel where she was, she was defenseless. Until I only feel 4 spears entering the only thing she had left of herself and being sealed

Where is your brother, if they were both gods they could both finish off all those mortals together, right? Yes they could do it but Void did not want to put Nova at risk, he knew that if she was not there life could be fine, it could follow a natural course, she could continue creating the Dark Matter or puff But if they caught Nova they could have the power in Hades or in their own knights it would be chaos in death, so with tears in his eyes Void said goodbye to Nova saying that she knew That he was going to get her out of there, no matter how much time passed, she knew that her brother would get her out while he was gone and prevent Nova from leaving Hades through magic.

Nova, unable to leave Hades, can only cry, scream, and be filled with despair as she watched her sister being tortured by those who sealed her, even though she wants to go for her, even though he would be able to give himself up to leave his sister, he could only cry while being supported by his knights, Nova ended up hating herself for not being able to do anything for her sister, or for her own knights who were now considered a danger by the Mortals

The ancients achieved part of their mission of sealing a goddess, now it would be the next part of their plans while they hide the truth from both gods, They painted themselves as the good guys saying that the seal was necessary because the goddess Void was destroying ever ne in her path, they named their own heroes, Even if he knew his "heroes" were terrible people, as long as they served him he would use them for their own good.

And so Void was left as a destroyed goddess, mutilated, sealed in places so that no one could come close to helping her, not even her brother who was hurting himself trying to get her out of there.

If you got this far, thank you! THANK YOU! This is the first time I upload Void's Lore, there are some things I want to explain later.

But from Void's side it's what it is so far, thanks for reading and thanks anon for asking

[signanothername]

UT/UTMV Asks Masterpost (part 1)

This will only include silly asks

*tip! Those in red text will contain an explicit discussion/visual display of some sort of trigger/content warning, these could be blood, emotional or physical abuse, emotional manipulation, death, self destructive behaviors, implied or discussed suicidal ideation, suggestive content or other sensitive topics

*tip! Those in orange text will contain an implied or mentioned trigger/content warning but no explicit discussion/visual display

*tip! Asks with 💬 are without art, only text

Let me know if I missed color coding anything :)

haha short nightmare short!! shorty!!!

obsessed with how u do killer btw.

I WANT TO EXPLODE YOU

Could you draw a Nightmare sitting on a cut tree trunk (their mom)?

Just wanna say keep up with the angst

Mean girl Nightmare

He’s just a silly little girl causing some chaos <3333

Could I please have a little sketch of nightmare "protecting" Dream from Cross

Bad Sanses reaction to Shatter Dream?

When confronted with his future self, Passive's first instinct is to push Dream behind him 💬

*Explodes but not in a gay way*

*Returns back just to explode in a gay way*

I forgot to kiss the homies goodbye.

What do you think about swapdream?

Why do you like Killer 💬

If you had to give your favourite sanses vehicle modes what would they be? 💬

Nightmare, do you still love your brother? If you don't why don't you kill him at all?

Consider nightmare in grunge fairycore fashion

Killer with kitties

What gave it away????

if there‘s a „Something New“, is there a „Nothing Old“

opinions on skeleton appreciation day :>

cat socks

Color spectrum duo

Guest offer

i’m so happy to see ccino getting more attention!!

ccino our cutie pie <3

i thought nm was doing the mr beast pose for a sec lolol

opinions on Asylum Sans (Asy)???

do you like afterdeath??? Can we get some?

Gaster’s Horrortale request

REQUESTING FOR MURDER!SANS ART

A tiny Nightmare sketch

Shapshifter

do you have any other plans for misplaced hatred? im kind of really obsessed with it

Do you think you might add more onto the misplaced hatred comic soon?

Silly sneak peek

Murder sketch

Nightmare sketch (foreshadowing????)

Bitty Nightmare

Bitty Killer

POKE HOLES IN THE TOPS OF THE JARS

Doodle without context

doodle with your non-dominant hand

Burnt at the stake

Mad scientist Killer

fugly ass heels

Yummy angst

Frenemies

Friend dynamic

Nightmare angst

Fresh

What if the Apple incident was more historically accurate for the time

Sci

Wips and sketches

Ink has certain devices that helps him in warning that he's ruining low of paints

can you do a doodle of nightmare with his hood up please?

Gay

Killer stress ball

What if Nightmare had hair

Consider Nightmare

Hey Dream can you make something or someone health Nightmare's legs or make some mental legs for him?

Frisk and Chara

Ccino and Nightmare

Ink and the Nightmare gang

Horrortale

who is your favorite utmv papyrus?

i love your work so much man it's like the highlight of my day when you post ‼️‼️‼️

That's mean that Killer is probably a Sugar Daddy

i love how you're just THE killer sans person now

I want somebody convincing Dream to smoke

What do you nightmare does, keeps Negativity balanced or he just spread Negativity 💬

What kind of music do you think the bad sanses listen to

bro i'm such a fan of error just massively shitting on nightmare 💬

If Killer are interrest by Cross’ blood and Souls, did he’s interrest by Cross’ unique soul ? 💬

If Nightmare's an ice-cream flavour, what would he be? 💬

What do you think is Killer's favourite ice cream flavour? •w• 💬

Something about Killer is actually scary to me 💬

His fire burned out a long time ago 💬

Golden flower tea 💬

Wait, I'm sorry but in the comic where Killer almost cuts someone's eye out, is that Color or Nightmare? 💬

the short kings go for the kneecaps 💬

Hey, do you think it'd be funny if Killer and Nightmare gossiped about other people together? 💬

nah i can't belive killers just resting his head on nightmares lap like that while nightmare pets him 💬

If Nightmare knew about every spectrum he was on 💬

they, for no particular reason, are wearing cat ears

Cat coded Cross 💬

What is your opinion of Killer with freckles

Silat Sans

I think Toga and Ochako are very Colourkiller

Soriel

I was wondering if there were any nightmare ships you like? Romantically or Platoniclly 💬

Killer costume change

What do we think of apple twins being able to do photosynthesis because their mother is a tree💬

either think THEY'RE the taller twin and that's what they tell everyone

What do you think everyone smells like? Especially killer? 💬

do you think NM could grow or make shift wings out of his tendrils or goop?

Killer and lil Paps

Human Nightmare and Dream

[crushedsweets]

Hello! I hope you are well!

Do you think it’s possible for you to go into Jeff and Nina’s relationship please? Like are they together or is like Jeff taking advantage of Nina liking him so much?

Sorry if you’ve already done this! I love your writing, you’re so talented 🕸️ x

its actually crazy to me that i havent actually written a thing about jeff and nina oh my god. thank you by the way you are so sweet. of course tw for manipulation, abuse, etc

OK BACKSTORY

nina is a year or two younger than jeff, and was only around 12-13 when she found out about jeffs murders and rampages. since she was like 7, she was always obsessed with horror movies, gore, eventually true crime and stuff . . just awful things that kids shouldnt have access to but thats what the internet does

she started behaving incredibly weird after her obsession with jeff began (though she was always odd). just really creepy true crime fan behavior in school, acted completely rebelious and eventually cut a shallow smile into her cheeks. her parents were livid and sent her to her to live with her grandparents in Mississippi.

eventually she realized jeffs brother moved to alabama, a state away. she was 18, at the lowest point in her life, and there was now speculation that jeff died after his most recent murder in the arkensaw household in tuscaloosa, alabama.

SO SHE MOVED. stole a ton of money and jewlery and stuff from her grandparents, barely managed to secure a dingy apartment in tuscaloosa, and she went On The Hunt.

she's constantly spamming fangirl rhetoric on creepy forums and catches jeffs eye. dunno exactly how, but he ends up meeting up with her, where he realizes she was just. perfect ? like, he found her annoying from the getgo and knew she was a weirdo, but he knew how easy she'd perfect to manipulate, how much shit he could get from her, and she immediately was like 'COME HOME WITH ME ILL MAKE U DINNER' . so he does. theyre about 19-20 here.

okACTUAL RELATIONSHIP

they never actually date in the traditional sense. neither of them asked the other out, jeff doesnt even touch her if he doesn't have to. he does not love her. but nina truly, fully, completely believes they're together. she swaps between calling him her boyfriend and fiance. she tells all her coworkers about how 'oh my boyfriend finally proposed! im engaged guys!' and 'ohh we're thinking about kids..!! he said he wants a girl:)' and all of that. which its all lies, she just lies and lies and lies all the damn time about how great jeff treats her and how in love they are. she does it to all the other creeps too for a period of time, telling toby and nat about how kind jeff is to her and they know shes lying.

jeffs not really mean to her most of the time. she'll make him food, do his laundry, she's lied to the police for him, she's probably been an accessory to murder ... definitely actually since she's cleaning and bleaching his bloody clothes... so he's Nice (?)

by nice i mean like. he'll let her sit and rest her head on his shoulder, let her hold his hand, let her say she loves him. he'll joke with her sometimes, play video games with her, bring her on walks or whatever. wore a bracelet she made for him once. (emphasis on once). he tells her she's pretty if she asks

but again, he's using her - just for a place to stay, some extra money, and he'll even send her on runs to go get weed or something from dealers that give discounts to pretty girls. he won't hug her, won't buy her things, won't help clean up, etc.

NONE OF THIS IS SHIPPING OR ROMANTIC LIKE ITS ALL REALLY SAD AND HORRIBLE. most of the creeps are inherently violent, half are murderers, almost none have any emotional regulation . . theyre just very . yeah.

which is why eventually, he kinda like, loses his shit - he starts screaming about how she's a dumbass who threw her life away for him, how he doesnt give a shit about her, he's shoving chairs around, knocking things off tables. eventually he stabs her, once in the side of her stomach, and leaves.

nina knows jane from the other creeps and calls her as she's frantically trying to fix her own wound, and jane swiftly gets her. jane doesnt like her but jane has morals and knows jeffs mistreating nina - but ninas losing her shit when jane mentions a hospital and refuses to go to the ER, so she ends up in jack's cabin getting stitched up.

theyre all kinda shocked that jeff didnt just kill her. its real weird for him to stab her once and leave, but jeff knew how far ninas devotion went and completely expected her to grovel at his feet and beg for forgiveness, and now he can continue using her just like before . but nina twisted it in her head and convinced herself 'oh its because he loves me! he didnt kill me because he loves me! BUT HE'S MAD AT ME AND I CAN'T FIND HIM AND WHAT IF HE'S WITH SOME OTHER GIRL I NEED TO FIX THIS' but literally nobody wants to help her 'get back' with him because like ...... why would they ?????

so she gets onto whitepages, finds liu, and ends up on his doorstep.

that's where my drawing of her crying on lius kitchen floor comes from

ive kinda hit a point in the story where like... this part is the 'current' plot ??? like this is where we are at in this very moment . so i have nothing concrete for the future...

but overall she does get over him, thats probably where ill put more emphasis on her friendship with nat/toby and her eventual little sister type relationship with liu... i just need to figure out how to do that without it coming off as like 'and she went to therapy and everything was fine !^_^'

i want jeff ... to be... vbery miserab;e....... basically.

[ontologic-catgirl]

🌻

This is Stumm! Artsy film in cultists simulator. A can of nitrate film labelled STUMM! - 'Silent' or, perhaps, 'Mute'. The director's name, 'Jernik Krosse', is shakily appended. The film rattles through the projector, glows silently on the wall. It is the story of a foolish student of forbidden sciences, who recruits a dancer to entice the Dead back into the world through a flaw in its skin. It's a fiction, but here on a title card is laid out the Operation of the Declining Sun...

The Rite is depicted in chilling detail. Here is the flaw in the world, an Influence shimmering in luminous paint. Here is the dancer establishing an irresistible rhythm. Here the scholar recites the Operation; and now the misty dead whirls through the flaw to consume him! The film closes on the dancer's watchful eyes. Had she intended it all from the start?

Watching this film will grant you the Sunset Rite, a wonderful little thing because it sacrifices influences, like your depression for 2 edge throw in some magic words or a particularly morbid cultists, and convert your depression into summoning the corpse of your loved one back to life imperfectly as in they will last 140 seconds give or take. You can then send them to murder your boss or what have you important thing is the depression was sacrificed and the rite takes other influences which are all temporary making it so much better than the rite where i have to sacrifice people(unless im bored).

Now game play relevance aside how is this film allowing me to turn dread into a zombie army? "The assistant must cry tears of genuine emotion, which are asperged in the place where the influence lies. If all is done well, the Sun-in-Rags will consume the influence, acknowledge an ending, and lend its assistance."

Good ole Sun-In-Rags(it should be noted you can technically do this spell with The Elgiast but thats reading in between the lines and ignore that) depressed good ole bastard that he is with daddy issues. Great for casting the kill random person in the world spell. I get off topic, You invoke the sun-In-Rags with a symbolic ending he consumes the influence magic, but finally getting to the point i was going to make what kind of magic?

Fun Occultists in this game recognize 9 wisdoms (Marketting strategy made up by the Mare in the Woods) that represent the fields of occult knowledge I like to think of them as literary genre's like history, philosphy, how to manuals etc this is only like half wrong. Of the wisdoms that we're interested in are; Hushery. Sorry i wanted to make a fun point talking about Birdsong and like Bosk and how this is all very fun anylyssys of literary genre's. but my topic is so obviously Hushery I'm annoyed i didn't see that tillt his point in the paragraph. Stumm! is Hushery, Hushery is "The Great Art of Hushery understands the beauty of silence, and of its sundering." All of your fun murder spells though because 9-10 your invoking the Sun-In-Rags where going to concede and call them "Endings" (Dadday issues bastard never got over his dad dyding) Given that this is an art film and I did want to talk about how the wisdoms work. Wisdoms are places you can categorize knowledge and every knowledge fits at least two descriptions. Stumm! is so obviously Hushery lets grab the skill,

Sights & Sensations To mix the rarest colours, a merciless detachment is required. Sights & Sensations fits into 2 wisdoms first Hushery, upon which if you do you get this tidbit "The artist knows: their every work could be improved. The artist understands: perfect work can never be completed. Perfection exists only as absence: Hushery understands this." This is what the field of Hushery thinks about this topic, but what of Nyctodromy? Classfying Sights and Sensations as such gives us "The artist knows: their every work could be improved. The artist understands: perfect work exists Nowhere. To go Nowhere - to go below the world - is not an easy journey. But there the artist could achieve their utmost. Nyctodromy is the way to perfection." Which is a somewhat similar conclusion this is knowledge dealing with endings but if you're feeling particularly hubrisic there is a place beyond endings Nowhere such is the domain of Nycodromy, "The nightliest of the Night Arts: travel through the darkness and the hidden places. 'Travelling at night is neither faster nor safer. That's why we do it.' Knowledge of the ways and byways of the transmundane." As I said much earlier obviously the wonderful film Stumm! is Hushery the artistic air around it leans to much into the purview of Hushery. But other readings exist one does wander what happened to the main character of the film and whether he found a place to rest in the Mansus or pehaps transcended in a sense to Nowhere.

[strawberrystepmom]

I have two zodiac-based questions (but not horoscope explanations like you've been doing), the first is dependent on whether or not you've watched Fairy Tail. (I'll send a separate ask)

The second: if you were to assign ONE anime character to best exemplify the different zodiac signs, who would you pick? (Can be from any anime of your choice, and they don't all have to be from the same anime, but you can only pick ONE).

Alternatively you could pick two, but they have to be based on the month divide (social media tells me there's a different between June and July Cancers (and obviously the others, but we're in Cancer season lol)?).

Feel free to answer in your own time, or completely ignore it.

ALRIGHT! this has been such a fun task to complete and I cannot thank you enough for asking me such a thoughtful question. I really have pondered on this for days just to be certain I have it as right as I want it to be.

Aries: Akitaru Obi - Fire Force

reason: embodies most of the natural traits of Aries as a sign. motivated, hard working, friend and family oriented. willing to put in the work to get done what he needs to get done. he trains every day for this!

Taurus: Gon Freecss - HxH

reason: aside from being boy of All Time, Gon to me embodies everything a Taurean is at their best. loyal, digging their heels in when it matters the most, giving it all but also understanding the joy in laying on your back and watching the clouds roll by.

Gemini: Itachi Uchiha - Naruto

reason: literally the most stereotypical Gemini I can think of even down to his decision making processes. committed to the bit when he was ready to go all in, thought a lot about it before then, remains fluid in his decisions afterward although it comes from an altruistic and good place.

Cancer: Ichigo Kurosaki - Bleach

reason: truly every Cancer trait exists in this man in a way I've seen very seldom. he's loyal, emotional, compassionate, but he doesn't let it blind him and this is common for a lot of Cancer people once they can suss a situation out.

Leo: Bulma Briefs - DB/DBZ

reason: hot genius heiress and literally knows it. I feel like a simple look at her screams LEO so loudly I don't really need to explain.

Virgo: Kakashi Hatake - Naruto

reason: the first Virgo man to ever make me crazy gets to keep his title but mostly because of his internal thought processes. Kakashi's anxiety has been widely debated in fandom for many years but I've always firmly subscribed to the theory (and tbh fact if you read the manga but I digress) that is is wracked by it. he is loyal, he tends to be grounded but he questions himself. idk. just so Virgo it hurts down to this.

Libra: Joseph Joestar - JJBA

reason: please watch one episode of Battle Tendency to know more. I will not be defending this decision and you will come back to tell me I'm right.

Scorpio: L Lawliet - Death Note

reason: intelligent, intuitive, endearingly strange. he is the Scorpio pinkprint in the very best way.

Sagittarius: Asuka Langley-Soryu - NGE

reason: literally every Sagittarius stereotype exists in this lovely young woman and she does no wrong to me so it doesn't matter but she's brash, she's proud of herself, she gets done what she sets out to do.

Capricorn: Senku Ishigami - Dr. Stone

reason: work ethic alone. he is the most stereotypical Capricorn I can think of in any media depiction down to deep emotions and the way he views his comrades and the things he does for them to make a world they weren't meant to be in more comfortable for them. I LOVE U SENKU!!!

Aquarius: Suguru Geto - JJK

reason: even if he hadn't gone murderous over it, he is an Aquarius through and through, down to everything he does being for the whole rather than himself.

Pisces: Yuuta Okkotsu - JJK

reason: literally the Pisces stereotype. kind, compassionate, good to everyone, everyone eventually becomes family which is just sooooo deeply Piscean thanks to our ability to really tune in and be there for people. just so good. glad to be associated with him.

[v3nusxsky]

Hihi I have a really funky request for a platonic Lady Lesso x Never!student-

A never student sleeps in class a lot and ignores Lady Lesso's warnings multiple times so one day Lesso gets pissed and takes the reader to the doom room-

Lesso demands a reason why the reader sleeps all the time and the student says because she can dream to escape reality-

Thennn Lady Lesso asks her what she dreams about and the student says she dreams about her-

Lady Lesso isnt sure if she wants to know the details but decided to tease the student and asks her about it-

Andddd the reader says she dreams of Lady Lesso killing her parents who are neglective and abusive. [sorry if it's too much haha its my experience u dont have to go into details if u dont want to]-

The answer catches the dean totally off guard and she didnt expect that kind of answer, she thought the student was just another hormonal silly teen ifykyk. And then it's just hurt/comfort and fluff-

My dream world

*Authors note< in such a good mood to write this for you so here you go*

Trigger warning~ swearing abusive parents

Prompt~ see ask*^^

You'd lost count how many times you had napped in Curses and Deathtraps, and how many times Lady Lesso had warned you that this ignorance would not be tolerated. Hell you'd even had a doom room trip, although nothing like what you had heard the stories about. You'd been left all night bound to a chair in darkness, her words roaming your brain "if you can't sleep in your dorm maybe you'll sleep here so you can actually pay attention in my class" yet for you it didn't work.

You continued to sleep where you felt safest, the classroom. And nothing would stop that not even the great Dean of Evil herself. This one particular day you had a double of the lesson which resulted in multiple naps that were disturbed by the crack of her cane on your desk and hissed words of warning. You saw when she snapped, the doom room is where you would be hearing and truthfully you couldn't care less. You needed sleep and if this is how you get it then so be it.

As soon as the lesson ended you were dragged by the arm to the doom room and strapped into that chair once more. Assuming you were alone you let your mind relax. Truthfully you were exhausted and frustrated, why can't she just leave you be! A yawn escaped you, and that's when you heard the tale tale signs of Lady Lesso's cane. Once more you were met with her pissed off look, clearly showing you that you had really bothered her. "Why do you have to be such an insolent child and refuse to pay attention to my very clear and direct warnings." She spat stalling up to you as if you were prey.

She paused for a little wondering if she cared enough to stand here and find out just what was going on or if she should just leave you to sit here. Deciding this needed to stop once and for all she asked the dreaded question. "Why do you sleep in my class?" Her tone was direct and leaving no room for any arguments. "Because I want to escape this" you murmured avoiding her gaze, "my dreams at the only time I feel peace, I can't sleep where I don't feel safe." The information seemed to give her a pause for a few moments. Emotion's flickered through her eyes and you couldn't help but try to understand. "What is it that you dream of?" Her curiosity soaked her words. Perhaps this would give her leverage.

With a sinister smirk you decided to play this game, "you truly want to know, well I dream of all the ways you could murder my parents. Some are intricate and detailed, others are quick and painful maybe even messy. Each way is unique and different and I enjoy seeing just what that twisted evil soul of yours could come up with. After all we are learning from the best here isn't that right Leonora?" You purred her name watching the anger flash over her features. You knew just what buttons to push and you throughly enjoyed pushing them.

"Why in the hell would I kill your parents?" She pondered out loud triggering an outburst from yourself. "Maybe because they are abusive and neglectful assholes who deserve so much more than death by your hands. Maybe you thought I was a mindless puppy drooling over you? But no. I dream of how your twisted mind would torture the bastards that had tortured me for years before I came here." The venom in your words was undeniable and it caused the older women to step back from you. Perhaps you had hit the nail on the head, maybe she wanted to be right and now she knew she was wrong it was hurting her pride?

You would be lying if you said you didn't believe Lady Lesso was attractive. Anyone who stated that would have to be blind. It was a fact you knew she knew. So why feed into it? Yet this side of her, was one you hadn't seen and didn't quite know what to do. She freed you from the chair and stepped forward opening her arms. Why in the hell was she offering to hold you? Yet, affection was something that was usual withheld from you so you took it slowly. When her arms wrapped around you, sobs took over your body as you let out years of pain. She hushed each and every stuttered sentence, her hand stroking your back in a calming and motherly manner. This was definitely not what you thought your doom room trip would be. Yet telling someone allowed you to feel a kind of relief you believed to be impossible. You were safe and warm, and now you didn't feel so alone, your secret was out and maybe one day she would act on your thoughts. Maybe.

Word count ~ 1025

[crimeronan]

re: your empathy posts. As someone who probably has higher than normal empathy (I used to ask people around me how they deal with sympathetic distress in common situations that occur in a job and only got blank stares) you're so valid!! The lionizing of this random subconscious process called empathy is so useless! It says nothing about the person and their values! As your other commenters suggested, people disparaging you may just be trying to boost their own shaky feelings about how their own emotional stability is deeply tied to their people-pleasing tendencies.

If anything, I think learning to function "normally" in society with "empathy" makes you more messed up. I understand this person's distress. I acknowledge it, and know how my actions will make it worse. I make them feel worse anyway, because that's the organizationally approved behavior, causing more pain for both them and myself. All the while I must behave as if I am cheerful and unbothered. Internalizing that hurting others and yourself to achieve your goals is Fine is necessary in order to stay sane. This is counter to everything people say they believe, so lying also has to become a virtue.

Buying kindness from the store seems like a really kind thing to do tbh. I am passing you on the street as I am schlupping over to pick up some callousness.

this last sentence made me giggle a lot. but YEAH!! a lot of this is spot-on to stuff i've been thinking about lately. like, "normal" empathy levels seem to be socially defined as "you care about people and want to help them, but you don't care so much that you'll harm yourself in pursuit of that" and it's all just..... i dunno. so much pathologizing of how we think and feel and whether we're Human (TM) about stuff. it's all so Weird

like..... i keep thinking that my lack of empathy gives me certain advantages in social situations. but in a similar vein to the ppl worried about sounding like tiktok empaths for being hyperempathetic, i worry that this makes me sound like an alpha male influencer writing youtube essays about why emotions make you weak, or whatever.

it's not that emotions make people weak or that having less empathy makes me like, a Cold Logical Calculating Math-Loving Strategist. i'm a writer who focuses solely on character-driven stuff, u probably wouldn't expect that from a stereotypically sociopathic person. part of why i LIKE writing character-driven stuff so much is BECAUSE i've had to actively teach myself how other people think, how they feel, how they struggle, etc

a lack of empathy means i can choose not to get invested in other people's feelings or lives, i don't feel guilty for emotionally disconnecting, i'm not afraid of being disliked. but i still know how to act like a decent human being. there's that one post about how stupid it is not to realize being nice gets people to be nice back, and fuckin. YEAH!! it's astonishing to me to read about cases of """clinical sociopaths""" (who are just people who didn't get the 'pretend you give a shit, moron' memo) manipulating and gaslighting people and whatnot. everyone in the comments will always be like "ooo so scary... they didn't feel bad at ALL... so terrifying that people who don't feel guilt exist..." and i'm like.

IS GUILT THE ONLY THING THAT KEEPS YOU FROM COMMITTING ATROCITIES???

BLOWS MY MIND. IT'S LIKE..... THE LEFTIST EQUIVALENT OF SAYING EVERYONE WOULD BE MURDERERS IF THEY WERENT SCARED OF GOD. LIKE. YOU ONLY AVOID DOING BAD STUFF BC IT MAKES YOU FEEL BAD??????

good LORD. at least having no empathy means i've had to grow my principles organically. oh my GOD.

anyway what brought these thoughts up today was that i was thinking about gansey and luz noceda, since theyre extremely similar characters & on my All Time Faves list. and i've said this before but the things i love about them (the kindness, self-sacrificing shit, anxiety, etc) are things i don't see in myself. but Wish I Did. like i wish i was kinder on the inside than i am.

but i know that i admire ppl with luz and gansey traits both in fiction and in real life. so i simply just..... emulate the luz and gansey actions. not always successfully, esp because i have a temper and very little patience, but like. i try to be kind where i can bc i wish i was someone who tries to be kind when they can. so i'm just going to be. u know??